TRUST

My word for 2021 is trust. Before 2020, life experience was teaching me to become a little more pessimistic, expecting the worst to happen with the consolation that if and when good things did happen, I’d be even happier than if it was just expected. And I was satisfied with the knowledge that even if the worst happened, at least it would meet my expectations, even if it didn’t surpass them. In late 2019, I felt God wanted me to grow up a little in this area, and be a bit more positive but then 2020 came and if anything, my optimism decreased. Leading into 2021, after a truckload of disappointment and eye opening moments in 2020, I decided that I would go in with 0 expectations that anything is going to be better, in the hope that I’d be pleasantly surprised. BUT, on the 1st of Jan as I poured my heart and my frustration and my fears, with things already looking ominous, onto my journal pages, I felt God challenge me to change my perspective.

Throughout my life, and especially through regen in 2020, I’ve been learning how to trust God’s plan for all those big things in my life when they have been and continue to be unexpected. And over the last couple of months I’ve been learning how to do life more in God’s strength rather than my own. Those 2 key things go hand in hand to be my big challenge and my ‘new years resolution’ if you like, for 2021, culminating in this word TRUST.

To trust God's plan even when plans aren’t going to plan by 1st Jan,

To trust God is good through the disappointment that will come,

To trust that even when life seems wacky at the moment, that God is still on the throne,

To trust that even when I’m anxious that God is always with me,

To trust that God sees the bigger picture,

To trust that He will help me through every moment of every day,

To trust that even when things look too hard, nothing is too big for God

To trust that my plans are so much safer in His hands, and

To trust that because He is good and He never changes, there is so much good to be found in 2021.

So instead of expecting nothing from 2021 to save me from being disappointed, the challenge I am undertaking is to search for the hidden treasures and different kinds of 'good' things each day. To really fix my eyes on Jesus no matter what is going on around me because in Him, I have all I need and it doesn’t matter if everything gets cancelled because my joy isn’t found in the stuff that I do, but in Jesus. My favourite quote still remains this one by Kay Warren “Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of my life, the quiet confidence that ultimately, everything is going to be alright and the determined choice to praise God in all things.” Every time I read it I am so encouraged by the reminder that my joy isn’t dependent on me, it’s on Jesus and even in 2021, my joy is still dependent on Jesus and there’s nothing that can take that away.

The Bible verse that God put on my heart for 2021 is “We walk by faith not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:7). So I am trying to hold every day of this year, every plan, every hope and every dream, loosely in my hands, not out of fear of loss, but out of trust that even though I can’t even see what might happen tomorrow, my TRUST is in my faith in Jesus. A lot of me is wrestling with this because I always want everything to go to plan and work out well, and I hate change and uncertainty (so don’t ask me how I’m going with this yet cos my mum’s tear stained shoulder is how it’s going by Jan 2nd haha), but even though part of me is terrified about what this year could look like, I’m excited for the adventure and to grow stronger in my faith and to look back on 2021 and see all that God has done.

The unknown doesn't have to be scary when we remember that even in the smallest and most mundane moments of our life, God is right there with us, helping us, strengthening us, guiding us, and loving us. Even if planning becomes a thing of the past cos life keeps getting turned upside down, there is no power on earth that can change God's plan and God's purposes. So, we can all be full optimists for 2021 cos it will be a good year because every year is God's year!